Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
