She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Boobs speak an international language.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
