At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Randomize
