is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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