Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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