Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Randomize
