you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
