you would pick up someone in the library
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Randomize
