I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
