Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Bring me that man meat
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
