doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize
