Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
