She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Randomize
