That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize