we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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