Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
