This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
They should really pass out barf bags in church
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
