also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
