My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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