Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
