on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
