My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
