I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
