PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
