i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize