if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
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