I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
