he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
