Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I forget how to act sober
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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