he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
