just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
