he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Also, beer. Big fan.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
