I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize