I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
