that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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