You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize