I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
