i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
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