Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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