As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
i am craving dick and cupcakes
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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