Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
