Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Randomize
