I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
