so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
