Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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