He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize