We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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