Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
