It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
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