I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
